This post contains some affiliate links. If you make a purchase using my link, I may receive a small commission. I only recommend companies and products that I love and trust. This keeps the coffee brewing and the words flowing, so thank you for supporting Faithfully Planted!
You’re engaged, smiling, beaming and staring at your new ring with daydreams of your new life with your soon-to-be husband. But wedding planning and preparing for marriage is not like the movies. It is hard work and can quickly overwhelm you if you don’t take time to prepare.
I remember feeling that way when I got engaged. I was so excited but that quickly turned to total overwhelm, not only with all there was to do, but with the expectation that was placed upon my wedding. And to add to the stress, my fiance had just joined the Army right before he proposed and would be gone for 4 months leading up to our wedding.
I wanted to prepare for marriage as best I could and to make that a priority over just my wedding. And I know so many of you want to do the same, so I’ve rounded up some of the best resources for doing just that.
Pre-Marital Counseling
Let me begin by saying, the resources listed here should be in addition to your pre-marital counseling done by your Pastor. If this is not a service they are offering, I would consider finding someone else who will invest in you for more than just the ceremony.
If you are unable to find someone else (such as a venue requirement or family awkwardness) there are Christian counseling practices that offer this kind of counseling. Do yourself and your future marriage a favor and invest in this learning now.
Like any endeavor, the more time you take to prepare, the less time you will spend figuring it out as yo go.
Entering into marriage without preparation or pre-marital counseling is like being dropped into a new country with no knowledge of the language or culture. You’ll figure it out the hard way and with a lot of stress instead of feeling prepared and comfortable.
If you can do all of the hard work on the front end, the experience itself will be much more enjoyable and you will be able to spend that time forging a deeper connection.
Many people talk about the difficulties that come with such a big life transition, but it doesn’t have to be as hard as people say it is. You can make it easier and smoother by taking the time to prepare well for your marriage now.
Preparing For Marriage Tools
365 Connecting Questions for Engaged Couples by Marriage 365
This book is exactly what it says it is: 365 questions for engaged couples to start important conversations and to have fun. They have a book for married couples also for after the wedding! It is written by a couple who founded a wonderful non-profit after rebuilding their own marriage.
They are full of wisdom and this book will bless your engagement season. It’s also a great engagement gift!
31 Prayers for My Future Husband & Future Wife books by Jennifer & Aaron Smith
These books also make a great gift for engaged couples. They both feature 31 prayers geared toward your future spouse. My husband and I went through the books for married couples and love the format that Jennifer & Aaron write in. It is a great training tool for making prayer a priority for your fiance!
Creating this habit now will bless your engagement season and your future marriage.
Preparing Your Heart For Marriage by Gary Thomas
This book by Gary Thomas is made up of devotions for engaged couples. The purpose of his book is to help couples prepare for marriage both practically an spiritually. It is Gospel-focused and covers a wide range of topics, from intimacy to differences to cultivating friendship.
These devotionals will help you to grow closer as a couple and to Christ.
Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married by Gary Chapman
Gary Chapman, the creator and author of The Love Languages, pours out so much wisdom for marriage in this book. This book can be read and applied in any stage of relationship (single, dating, engaged or married) but will be especially practical for couples preparing for marriage.
He covers so many topics that many of us spend years trying to figure out in marriage, from resolving conflict without fighting to live with someone who has opposite habits all the way to sexual compatibility and struggle.
This book is intended to pull back the veil of what marriage is really like and to help you arm yourself with knowledge.
Tying the Knot: A Premarital Guide to a Strong & Lasting Marriage by Rob Green
Tying the Knot stems from Pastor Rob Green’s experience counseling so many engaged couples. Many go into engagement not knowing what marriage will be like and spend too much time and energy on the wedding. Many couples expect marriage to be wonderful automatically once they tie the knot, but so often that isn’t the case.
This book is meant to show you a biblical, Christ-centered vision for marriage and to help you cultivate that even before the wedding. This resource is used by many pastors and counselors and will certainly grow you as a couple preparing for marriage.
Ready or Knot by Scott Kedersha
Ready or Knot is a practical field guide for engaged couples preparing for marriage. He offers wisdom and stories from counseling over 5,000 couples for marriage.
My favorite part of this book is the real-life stories told alongside the practical advice. If you’re looking for an authentic, real resource to help you preparing for marriage, this book is it.
Getting Ready for Marriage by Jim Burns and Dough Fields
This book is a devotional and a road map all in one. It is a simple but deep resource for engaged couples preparing for marriage. The name is right on the nose.
If you’re looking for a resource that will point you and your fiance to Christ, this book will help you do that. It will focus your hearts on the right things so your marriage will be off to a great start!
Happily Ever After Premarital Course
This course is created by the same couple who wrote the connecting questions books listed above. This resource is not Christ-centered and has a more psychological foundation, but I include it for couples who are maybe not attached to any church resources and need a solid premarital course to go through. This course is hefty and covers all the potential “hard” topics that a lot of couples wait to talk about until it’s a problem.
Used in conjunction with a Biblical resource listed above, it is incredible for helping couples prepare for marriage.
Resources for Christ-Centered Wedding Planning
There are a lot of resources out there for helping couples prepare for marriage, but what about the wedding planning part? Though we put emphasis on preparing for marriage over planning the wedding, that wedding still needs to be planned! And it can be done in a Christ-centered way.
As Christians, we exist to glorify God and our wedding days should be no different. The worldly perception that its the “bride’s day” could not be more off. Our weddings should be a reflection of the Gospel, as that is what marriage symbolizes. The resources listed here are books I read when I was planning my wedding and helped me to keep Christ at the center of it, rather than myself.
Inviting God to Your Wedding by Mary Williamson
This book was such a breath of fresh air for me as I was planning my wedding. I had so much information and expectation surrounding wedding planning that I didn’t know how to prioritize and cut through the noise.
This book helped me do that. It helped to center me on God in the midst of a lot of chaos and I highly recommend it to any bride. It is the antidote to the bridezilla , self focused culture we live in.
A Christ-Centered Wedding by Catherine Parks & Linda Strode
This book is another wonderful resource for planning a wedding focused on the Creator and sustainer of love: Jesus. This book not only helps you focus your wedding on Christ, it helps you with all the practical steps needed to plan a Christ-centered wedding.
For couples preparing for marriage, planning a wedding focused on Christ can easily get lost in the overwhelm. This book includes checklists, ceremony examples, sample vows, traditions to use or not use and so much more. It takes the tasks of wedding planning and filters them through the Gospel.
For Christian couples, it is important that our weddings are symbols of the Gospel and that is displayed through every detail. This book will help you do just that and make it less overwhelming
Are you engaged? Tell me about yourself in the comments!
Praying these resources bless you and your future marriage.
